Why Do We Put Busyness On A Pedestal?

Why Do We Put Busyness On A Pedestal?

Photo: Khristee Rich

Many times when someone asks how someone else is doing, the other person may respond, “I am so busy.”

I always find the response “That’s good” to be odd.

Why are they glad the other person is busy instead of well or happy?

And some people even say, “Well, at least it’s better than the alternative.“

Better than being relaxed and at peace? Better than someone feeling they are enough and that they don’t have to hustle to fit in? Better than feeling balanced and healthy?

I think it’s so important for us to practice mindfulness.

Why is it a common response to say “That’s good” instead of “Are you happy? Are you keeping busy with things that bring you joy?”?

Busyness can be good if someone is enjoying being busy, doing the things that they enjoy, that light them up.

But most of us are doing things we don’t enjoy: working at a job we don’t enjoy and taking on too many roles as a caregiver, wife, friend etc

Busyness just for the sake of busyness or showing others our success or trying to be productive is unhealthy

Where does this sentiment come from that busyness is always good?

Is it ingrained in our culture from slave times?

Is it ingrained in our culture when women were supposed to do everything as a homemaker for her children and her home?

Is it ingrained in our culture from when women were allowed to work and make their own living?

Or it is a result of our present culture where a woman is expected to be a super woman and be a career woman, a mother, a lover, a friend, a caregiver and pursue her dreams and passions?

Is it because of our workaholic society that we only see busyness and laziness and no in between?

I hope that in my lifetime people will begin to prioritize feeling good over being busy.

I hope people will become more mindful of their words.

I hope that when people ask how someone else is doing that they really want to hear the response instead of doing it as a common greeting.

Trauma is on the rise.

Trauma is on the rise and people are suppressing their feelings because they believe they have to show to the world that they are being productive.

They feel they have to show that they are perfect.

They feel that they have to show they are independent and not ask for help.

They feel they have to keep going juggling too much.

They burn out.

They get sick.

They become depressed.

They still hustle.

They develop a chronic condition.

They still hustle.

They develop a chronic illness.

They still hustle.

It’s an unhealthy pattern.

I understand trauma because I work with so many clients who have had unresolved traumatic experiences.

Because they didn’t heal it, it has bled into other areas of their lives.

It’s time for us to check in with how we are really feeling.

It’s time for us to prioritize feeling good over the hustle.

It’s time for us to focus on living a joyful, healthy life and what that looks like is individual for all.

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