Identity — Blog (The Dancing Hummingbird)

Indigenous People’s Day

Today is Indigenous People’s Day.

It wasn’t until my boyfriend in San Francisco back in 2011 called Columbus Day Indigenous People’s Day that I began to call it the same. He was the first person I had ever heard say Indigenous People’s Day and to honor Native people on this day.

And I am part Native American.

Today it actually makes me sad that people say Columbus Day and honor someone who didn’t discover America but was the beginning of land being taken away from Native people.

In grade school, I remember learning about Manifest Destiny.

It was man’s destiny to take as much land as he could the text books said.

We didn’t learn that peace between the early settlers and Native Americans was not true.

I Can't Believe They Said That

When I was in high school, I attended a summer theater program at Northwestern University called Cherubs. it was specifically for high school students with an interest in theater. And since it was in Evanston, Illinois, students came from all across the U.S. I loved it.

I don’t know how I got onto the subject, but I remember telling a boy that I was black.

He said, “How can you be black? You’re white.”

To which I replied, “Both of my parents are black.“

“But you’re white… Are you an albino?”

At this point in my life, I was not ready for difficult conversations. I was dumbfounded. Did he ask me if I was albino? Obviously, he was not exposed to many blacks and didn’t know we came in all shades.

Creativity, Authenticity, Identity, MindfulnessKhristee RichOctober 9, 2020black lives matter, authentic writing, authenticityComment

Peruvian Dark Night Of The Soul

Last fall, I went to Peru for a little over two months. When I arrived a white feather suddenly appeared letting me know my angels were with me. Later on, I went to a café and as I exited, I saw a large black feather at the doorstep. Excitedly, I picked it up knowing it was a sign, a big sign. But somehow at the time, I couldn’t remember what a black feather meant.

Many people assumed that since I was away for two months that I had the time of my life, that I went on a big adventure, but in fact I had a spiritual awakening.

During my trip, I collected lots of black feathers. They were everywhere. I had never seen so many black feathers. They were from the vultures that flew above the city. To be honest, I never felt that safe in the city. The crime had gone up a lot since I was there in 2016. It took me a long time to travel to South America alone because I was always worried about the crime. Many people warned me it was not as safe as in the U.S. or Europe and not to travel alone there. But since I was twenty, I wanted to go.

Spirituality, IdentityKhristee RichSeptember 10, 2020spiritual awakening, dark night of the soul, peru, peruvian adventureComment

Have You Ever Been Told That Your Hair is A Hazard?

I am continuing to share more of my personal stories so that people can understand systemic racism.

When I worked in a psychiatric hospital in New York I had an Afro at the time. It was a very big Afro. One day the HR person asked me to come to her office and she told me that I had to cut my hair. I had never been asked to cut my hair for a job before.

I was perplexed.

“Why do I have to cut my hair?” I asked.

“Because it’s too long,” she said.

“What does the length of my hair have to do with my position?” I asked.

She said, “Because your hair is so long that patients could grab it and it could potentially endanger you. So it is a hazard.”

I declined to cut my hair. I would not cut my hair for my job.

For me, my hair was my identity and I didn’t see anything wrong with having an Afro and working in a psychiatric hospital.

Authenticity, Identity, MindfulnessKhristee RichAugust 31, 2020racism in America, racism in The USComment

Have You Ever Felt Judgment From A Spiritual Teacher?

Many years ago, when I lived in Connecticut and had a debilitating chronic illness, I attended a gentle yoga class. I enrolled in the class for relaxation and socializing. The teacher said that the class was intended to be slow and gentle unlike many yoga classes which were competitive, high-energy, and athletic. I had chronic fatigue and no stamina, so slow and gentle was definitely my speed plus this class was spiritual, so she seemed to be the right teacher for me at the time to try to muddle through my chronic illness. But even though she seemed spiritual, I was surprised to see that she was judgmental. On one instance, during her yoga class, I’ll never forget it, she asked us to do a pose which I wasn’t able to do. She asked us to thread our fingers through our toes and I just couldn’t do it. She looked at me, shook her head, and started laughing. It would’ve been different if I was laughing and making fun of myself, but I couldn’t do it. I was frustrated. It was preposterous to me and she just looked at me and laughed.

I See You On Facebook. I Know Everything is Good With You.

I see you on Facebook.

I see your smiles.

I see your cute memes.

I see your highs.

I know everything is good with you.

I don’t need to see your diary entries.

I don’t need to know more than a post,

because you post every day.

What else could you have to say?

But that is only a fraction of me.

I am more than you see.

I have fears.

I have tears.

I have parts of me that I don’t want you to see.

I have shadows like you.

I have a past I try to undo.

I don’t have it all figured out.

I yell. I shout.

I have parts I don’t talk about.

Authenticity, Creativity, IdentityKhristee RichJuly 9, 2020poetry, authentic writing, authenticity, poet, Khristee Rich, Facebook, assumptions, shadowComment

They’ve Lied To Us

I am feeling mixed feelings today.
We celebrate freedom from the British today because we took freedom away from Native Americans.

Normally, I love the 4th of July.

It symbolizes freedom, fun, time with family and loved ones, good food, but how often do we think about what it really means?

This is the first time I took a moment to let it soak in.
Maybe because I have been doing so much soul searching and I have been looking at all the lies that have been told to us.

Everyone loves a day off. But what does the 4th of July mean?

In the history books, (they gave us in grade school), they say that Christopher Columbus “discovered” America in 1492.

They lied to us.

It was discovered before by Native Americans.
The United States didn’t begin because of a “discovery.”
It began from abuse of power.
Europeans believed in Manifest Destiny.
They believed that the more land they possessed, the more powerful they were.
They didn’t care if other people already lived here.
They wanted it for themselves.
Native Americans were not respected because of their race.
Because they were dark-skinned, spoke a different language, and were not Christian, they were seen as inferior.
Our country was created by abuse of power and racism.

Authenticity, IdentityKhristee RichJuly 4, 2020Native American, Fourth of JulyComment

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